Danny Roberts was a cast member on MTV's hit TV show "The Real World: New Orleans." which aired in 2000. At the time he was in a long-term relationship with a man named Paul, a captain in the US Army. Because of the U.S. Military "Don't ask, don't tell" policy toward homosexuals, Paul's face was obscured on TV and much national attention was brought to the issue.
Now Roberts gives motivational speeches to college-age students across the nation. I interviewed him in 2007 over dinner.
WG: What are some of the characteristics about yourself that you most identify with? Is it your time spent on the real world, the fact that you are openly gay, etc.?
Danny Roberts: I think what defines me as a person is that I like to constantly explore. That's a big reason why I love to travel. I always want to meet new people that challenge me and who I can grow through. And I don't ever like to feel like I'm any one type of person. Any time I start to feel like one type of person I feel stagnated.
I am quite often asked "Do I closely relate to being gay?" and, honestly, there is absolutely no doubt that it is part of who I am, but it never has been, and never will be my defining trait.
A lot of people do closely identify and label them selves along one trait line and I think that's very self limiting and yeah, I will never be that way.
WG: What do you have to say about your time spent on MTV's The Real World?
DR: My taking part in the "The REAL World" is not something that defines me, but there is no doubt that it has highly affected my life. There are people out there who let their reality TV show experience define their life and who they are from that point on, and I find that to be sad.
WG: Tell me where you are today.
DR: I came from a very small town in the south, and I don't even know how the hell I got to where I am now, but I love the direction I've been going. I got here by being that person who wants to expand and wants to grow and explore what the world is.
This world is huge and there is so much to see and experience and so many different kinds of people and so many different ways to think.
WG: What has been a major pivotal experience in your life?
DR: My entire college experience. The combination of the environment that I was in and the people that I met there really established the direction and the person that I've become since. I was really really open to a lot of things through the people there. At the time I thought I was open-minded, but I wasn't at all. I was so close-minded and had such limited views. But when I got to the University it made me realize not what I did know, but what I didn't know.
One of my favorite quotes is 'A wise person is somebody who knows what they don't know,' and that's all of life. You are never, ever going to know anywhere near what there is to know. That lesson has made my life since, and it will always be a part of my life.
WG: How do you think others view you?
DR: One bizarre affect of taking part in that show is the fact that strangers already do have a perception of me. When a lot of people already "know" a lot about me, they may not necessarily but perception is more important than anything. People often do recognize me more than you'd think. I'm not saying that everybody and their mom remembers, but it happens almost every day.
On a real level, in this real world, perception is bitch. Through this experience that's the number one lesson I carried away from that
All reality TV is, on a social level, is nothing but creating perceptions of people through the process of editing and production. And what you learn, if you're lucky enough to learn throught that process, no matter if it's positive or negative through the show is nothing but that - it's perception. But on a bigger view, that's the way the world works. That show is just a microcosm of the way the world works on a daily basis. The show just puts a magnifying class on it and it's scary what simple things can change a persons perception of you entirely.
When viewers are smart, they get that. But they don't, necessarily.
WG: What is your ultimate goal when it comes to speaking to young adults?
DR: Young people are so impressionable and I think that with the content that I discuss it is usually just younger generations that are open to the change I am trying to make change. It's important to reach younger generations so that we don't have to repeat the mistakes of our grandparents and parents.
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